Off Topic: TSA

I remember when I was living in Florida and it had been drizzling all day.  I was driving down the road in Lady Bug (that’s what my friends named my red ’89 honda civic) and the light turned red.  I started to push down on my breaks but wasn’t really slowing down.  I pressed harder and that’s when I started hydroplaning.  I slid right through the intersection.

Totally lucked out.  No one hit me but I had to pull off the road and just take some deep breaths.  I was scared poopless, I would have done anything to get rid of that feeling of terror.

That feeling of fear and helplessness is a huge motivator in peoples lives.  It’s a big reason that the Patriot Act was able to pass shortly after 911.

911 also made airport security a huge concern for Americans and the TSA stepped in to help alleviate that fear.  The TSA however has to walk a fine line of what is acceptable.  Where do people draw the line?  What freedoms are Americans willing to give up to feel safe?

Most of my news comes from Gizmodo because it’s mainly technology news and that’s what I’m most interested in (it also tends to be less tragic than reading a newspaper where nothing good ever happens).  The TSA has been in the news quite a bit (well at least techy news) because of the controversies over the full body scanners.

You stand on a turn table with your arms in the air like you are halfway to completing a jumping-jack.  Then it slowly spins you around while someone in a booth looks at your naked body.

No, you don’t strip for it but the way it works is that it uses a wavelength of light that passes through less dense materials (read: clothing) while bouncing back from denser materials (read: our bodies & anything hanging off them).  For a more detailed workings you can visit this link.

How much can you really see you ask?  I work at a porn store and if you take the images in the store (read: full frontal) and just make them photo negatives then that’s how accurate they are.  The computers the images are displayed on aren’t supposed to be able to record them but ya never know.

Let’s face it, technology is only as smart as the people using it.  How many people do you know that you wouldn’t trust your car keys with much less the ability to take naked pictures of you?

You can opt out of the full body scanners (which may or may not cause cancer, but then again everything does) which leads you to a TSA employee that will frisk you.

This isn’t the friendly frisk you get from the police this is the kind of frisk you get from your gyno ladies or when you go in for a physical guys and you have to turn your head and cough.  You know something is invasive when they have to give you a disclaimer.  Warning:  Don’t freak out when I cup your boobs or wrap my hand around your junk.

This man said no to the scanners and no to being molested so they escorted him out.  He’s one of many people that are saying NO to such invasive procedures and man o man is the TSA getting flack.  The TSA says that very few people are getting these types of pat downs but it seems that everyone who does is srsly pissed.

The stories I’ve read so far are the lady whose breast was exposed and a TSA (maybe some other airport employee) said they wished they had their phone when it happened.  She’s sueing BTW.

You have the “kid who was stripped searched at airport security“.  Now before you get outraged on that one the kid was being frisked by the TSA over and over so the father got fed up and took off the kids shirt.  Which I can understand.

Now… where does this put us at?

You have two sides obviously, those that feel giving up your right to privacy (ie. not being molested by strangers) is an acceptable loss for feeling safe.  The other is the please don’t make me get an adult side who feel it’s finally taking it too far.

My solution?  Hirer models and porn stars for the groping, people will be less pissed if someone way out of their league is doing things to them they’d normally have to pay for.

The perve in me says bring it, let’s get a frisk that is a few steps away from a handjob but realistically that isn’t something I should have to submit to just so I can fly.  No system is perfect and when something slips through a TSA full body scanner / invasive frisk they’ll use it as an excuse to get even more invasive.  How long before you have to showup at the airport in a trenchcoat so you can just flash the TSA employee?

I’m fine with the Xray machines and the metal detectors and the police level pat downs but I’m drawing the line at nudey pics being taken or a full body massage (minus the happy ending) happening.  TSA needs to figure out a better way to ensure our security and they need to figure out it out fast.  Preferably before it causes even more harm to the airline industry.

Fear is a crazy motivating factor but if you let it control your life… are you really living?  Don’t let the terrorist win.

(see what I did there?)


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