Earlier this evening (before the servers said you can’t login if you are with Comcast AND you have a battle.net account) when my raid started I had someone express interest that they’d like to go to tonights raid. One of my healers whispered me and offered to bow out for this person. I was like hell no. You can’t leave, your my favorite student.
I was joking of course (or was I!?) about the raider being my favorite. I like most of my raiders (about 12% of them) but I appear to like many more of them (no, you there, the one reading this, I like you, don’t doubt yourself).
Every raid leader wants to raid with people they like. If you don’t like someone then why are they in your raid… That’s not the right sentence. There are people in the past I have taken on raids who I didn’t necessarily like, but they were decent players who did a good job and I took them with me so that I could accomplish goals. This is the wrong end of the rainbow though, what about the raid member(s) that your raid lead likes to much?
1.the favoring of one person or group over others with equal claims; partiality: to show favoritism toward the youngest child.
2.the state of being a favorite.
How do you spot Favoritism?
Favoritism is cried out more often than “Why did you die in a fire?” Someone is always quick to yell that the raid leader is showing favoritism when things aren’t going their way. That doesn’t mean it should be discounted though.
Favoritism will quickly degrade a raid group and leave chunks of your player base with a sour taste in their mouth.
You are the Dungeon Master(DM) for your Dungeons and Dragons group (I don’t care how geeky it is, this is my example dammit). You lead a group of players around in a world. You provide the players with encounters and loot. DM-Xeo yells that the players have stumbled upon a nest of murlocs (yea, cuz you could easily stumble on murlocs…). The players dispatch the murlocs quickly and loot the bodies. Zalana finds leather scraps on one of them. Shiningstar finds the Holy Grail on another. The adventure continues and DM-Xeo shouts the players have stumbled upon Sartharion! Sartharion tosses out a breath attack that incinerates everything in a frontal cone. Zalana is vaporized, nothing is left of him except some leather scraps. Shiningstar is unharmed…
Player A whispers you, “Is there a raid slot open for a healer?”
…elapse 2 seconds…
Player B whispers you, “Is there a raid slot open for a healer?”
Both of those examples are pretty self explanatory but we’ll go over them a bit more indepth. Favoritism can be present from the first roll of the dice, it might just not be apparent to the players. In the first example Shiningstar simply seems lucky. Random loot is just that, random. Zalana is probably a bit grumpy he didn’t pick the right murloc but thats how the dice roll. Then Zalana is vaporized when Shiningstar isn’t even touched. This continues to the point that Zalana seems to not be able to catch a break while Shiningstar is walking on water.
You haven’t been altering Zalana’s rolls, he really is just that unlucky. You have been altering Shiningstar’s though. It’s difficult to understand at first… its not that you have been mean to Zalana, you just haven’t been fair. You haven’t put as much effort into helping him as you have Shiningstar.
The problem is this creates a gap between the players where one person is sailing along and the other(s) are scraping behind like servants. This might not even be fun for the person who is getting the favoritism shown to them.
Example 2 is a bitch. You will probably not know this type of favoritism is ever happening unless you stumble upon it simply by accident. This is often the result of a raid lead simply wanting to raid with people he likes. That doesn’t make it any less severe though. When people notice they are never getting picked they start to take notice. They will quickly see that person who signs up late for the raid or is never on time… but still manages to get slotted.
How do you deal with someone who is showing Favoritism?
Unlike insanity or selfishness the raid lead may not be very responsive to talks about this. Example 1 is your hopeful, best scenario. The raid lead probably doesn’t realize the effect it is having on other people. A quick talk can go far for you. Be careful on the approach though, it will be VERY easy to trigger defensive mechanisms. Try to keep it away from looking like it is an us vs. that person type of thing. This person is someone the raid lead likes quiet a bit.
Example number 2… EXTREMELY touchy. The raid lead makes a conscious effort to keep this person around them. They want them there and it is highly unlikely you will change their mind on this…
I’m actually not even sure how I would go about talking to the lead about this. I know that personally there are a few peeps I want to raid with. I will go out of my way to get them into the raid. This usually consists of people I like in that special way or IRL friends. I’m not going to hurt my raid group to bring them, but I don’t think there is anything someone could say to me that would make me stop bringing these people. Anyone have suggestions on how you might approach the raid lead in this situation?
Special Note: Are you in that raid group where the lead brings their significant other… and the significant other sucks so much you do every boss 1 person short? I feel so sorry for you it isn’t even funny. If you know the person well, you might try to talk to them in this circumstance and let them know it isn’t fair to the raid group to make them suffer in such a way.
If you have just joined the guild / raid group that is like this… move on, QUICKLY. It is highly unlikely you will a. change their mind or b. get slotted after you tell them how much their loved one sucks.